Blah!Blah!Blah!

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IMG_20141014_105831I see you BLAH; you see me BLAH

I know you know I noticed you look at my derriere

Impressed BLAH; by the depressed BLAH

You finally gather your kahunas

Then your constant BLAH earns you a second encounter

Strictly come sexy

Invitation only

Extremely uncomfortable I pitched

Oldest trick in the book played:

“Tell me more about yourself”

I smile; you are captivated

KaChing! jackpot

I speak from the heart as always

You listen with all the wrong instruments

All you see are my lips moving

While ‘you know what’ hears BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!

Just finished the story about losing my father

You lick your lips; eyes dilated

Pretty sure you are past second base with me already

I usually just get a condolence

I say more BLAH; You zone out BLAH

Still curious about the man behind the inappropriate glances

Shallow references to possessions I care the least about

Sweep me off my feet to your place you planned

The jig is up

Gosh; the way you uplift my body with your eyes

If only you paid that much attention to the being inside

Hoping to separate the body and spirit

Trying your charm like fractional distillation

I am trying to add depth to your sight cave men

But then again BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!

My abrupt departure blah; you confused blah

Energy wasting explanations I do not have time for

Its in the knowing women handbook

Should have gotten it when you got your goods too

Guess you and the rest of the nincompoops out there did not get the memo

Then you will only hear more BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!

And even more walk aways.

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Drafted thoughts

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DSC_0174-1My sister and I live in a Manhattan style loft apartment three storeys up, so that has ruled out the conventional fluffy companions. Instead we have three pet goldfish namely Jay-jay, Nemo and Mikey.. Its funny how I have taken to them so warmly in a matter of months,I mean sure I do not pat them or take them out for walks. But in honest truth we have watched tonnes of movies together, binging the Sci-Fi series together and brightest of all memories; they have been with me through my sleepless nights. Oh and I always lose to Jay-jay in staring contests. True confession; there were unique fun times with a different species. They have also bring about a sense of importance perhaps; such that when we both aren’t available, we give a third party an extra set of keys to check up on them.

What brings about such reflections is that Jay-Jay has taken ill for the past week. I have watched him fade away slowly. He used to be the life of the tank, most responsive to my gestures to interact. It is yet to be determined what is wrong with him, but I honestly fear the worst. The mere fact that I find myself unable to look at the fish tank fearing the worst is evidence of the magical connection between man and animal. This experience, though not my first with animals, has given me fresh eyes to look at our current situation. Honestly feels like we are puzzle pieces; making out a perfect picture of mother nature’s true intentions for us. More like balancing equations for sustainability. Feels like though we have our own species to rely on; animals are also there to complete a family, a home and even a broken soul wondering alone. Which brings me to one of my biggest challenges everyday, trying to understand how animal cruelty even exists. How every year we have more and more animals getting extinct. The worst for me is seeing people in pure fur or other endangered animal clothing. It’s more like wearing a brochure acknowledging your taking part in animal cruelty. I am not walking from this completely blameless; but I am moving towards rectifying the issue.

Someone has to say it

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IMG-20140405-WA001October was breast cancer awareness month as you may all know, and that is my point exactly: that we may all know. I know a lot of the times people complain about people destroying the environment and each other, but today I just want to thank everyone who tries their best. Its like with each generation we get more ignorant and impulsive to destroy so much that I am sure we will regret unfortunately in the near future, but again I am grateful that this generation has made a country’s problems; the WORLD’s problems. I have some inside information about how difficult it is to try and make people listen to what they aren’t ready to hear, be it HIV/AIDS, breast cancer or even teenage suicide. Fact is most people think ignorance is bliss. But throughout October I have been more than convinced that we might be getting there as a race, to that point where we might be able to stand together against war, poverty and environmental degradation. Next time you see an initiative supporting a good cause please join and help the battle for humanity. And if you already are, someone has to say thank you, I just thought to add my name to the hopefully long list of appreciative individuals.

Displacement Reaction

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I won’t let assumptions and misgivings wobble what we have

I will do what is required, to simply state facts

If we were only but just molecules

Living  life at the mercy of curiosity; having our fates decided

I would just observe a displacement reaction creating a stronger bond

I imagined this day would come

Leaving it to time to reveal its master plan

I thought I would be enraged at the thought of being replaced

I have always thought my greatest attribute is being irreplaceable

But I am happy you have found someone better

After much contemplation who could blame you

She’s so graceful; her every touch a breathe of fresh air

I have to admit I get jealous when I happen to witness your affections

At how perfection has been proven to exist

After much deliberation, I still am not sure if I ever made you smile or laugh whole heartedly

If I ever made you feel you were beyond satisfaction

Maybe we are just molecules

Weak bonds to be broken to make way for perfection

Our fates once entwined but already decided

Displacement reactions leaving me lonely but happy for your new found joyDSCF8792

A little bit of blood

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IMG-20141002-WA0007the following poem I wrote mainly for the Pledge 25 group currently operating in Zimbabwe, I never got the opportunity to share my passion for blood donation and I take part as often as I can, I hope it inspires you to do more.

Feels like its a borrowed life

It should if you never give back

Hoarding so much the world needs

Or is it that you do not know how the little things count

A smile; a greeting

A pledge 25 commitment

There is always someone in need

A hug; a kiss

A shoulder to lean on

You probably justify your selfishness

When blood donation becomes the topic

Not your fears or uncaring flair

Fine! you do not know who will be helped

A baby, your mother, yourself

Either way it is a human soul

That should be more than enough a reason

Everyone deserves a second chance

And your blood donation gives someone a fighting chance

Do not preach the good word

Live it!

Donate blood, save a life

live life with a difference.

Something has go to give

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Found myself meditating in front of the post office

Waiting for that one letter that would set my goals in motion

That was weeks ago; the wheels are now flat in position

Want to scream and shout

I end up laughing my lungs out

With each passing day the flames get bigger and bolder

You can only ignore the smell of your own burning flesh for so long

Was playing broken telephone with Destiny

Kinda said I could achieve anything as long as I put my heart into it

Kinda heard all my efforts would sum up to something

Cannot be two sides of the same coin

Walls fall like dominoes around me

So unpredictable, the only constant is that everything is tumbling down

You have to be insane to see the silver lining

Halfway through the storm

Thank God for my insanity

Though self destruction feels imminent,

I still find time for a cup of tea

Found myself sitting on the edge of the freeway

Waiting for something

Still don”t know what or whom

But something has gotta give

Because I am unaware of my sins.IMG00838-20121208-1216

Inner Roar

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IMG-20140329-WA007Took a lot more than usual to bring myself to blog, felt like a worm under the rug, took all my strength not to remain swept away. Yes hidden by vicious forces out there, be it discouraging people or your own demons; any individual should be able to relate to this. Been  jumping some hoops along this marathon and the worst thing happened to me: I GOT TIRED. It has not happened to me in years but here I find myself unable to comprehend even the simplest train of thoughts. For all the writers a bit under the weather I encourage you not to beat yourself too hard, we might be going through a transition, rather a transformation. Like caterpillars in a cocoon to emerge as butterflies. For myself I believe I am awaiting of my inner roar, from a little pup into,I only hope a majestic wolf. At the end of the day, we run out of oil so we can take some time to reflect, re-invent ourselves and begin again.

Hush Little Baby/ The Ghost She Created

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IMG01472-20130831-1647Every time she closes her eyes

She sees him again

Without a face, but more beautiful than she had imagined

She lays there next to him, gazing at the spectacle

That which if she had carried to full term

At least in the reality of forced dreams

Her world dawns upon his adoring eyes

His smile, pure happiness

His laugh, pure innocence

Beautiful boy; innocent soul

After that climax, the dream ends the same way

By tumbling her spirit into a swirl of endless sadness

Where regret chokes her to awake

First thought; all this wealth and still no cure to the guilt

He lays next to her; perfection in the art of man excellence

His muscles unflinching at her restlessness

Barely an academic herself, what future cold she have given him

Barely bills from her parents, barely any understanding from her peers

Intricacies of life: to create blissful innocence

As you have your innocence coitally removed

His strong arms pull her back to the present

Where she can almost convince herself that that one sacrifice was worth it

Honey; milk and all things rich

Now as they ask for words to her memoir

Of the life experience behind the mogul

Everything has been bound except that chapter

When she was only 19 and curious

Exhausted by running away from the truth

That only in these dreams is she a mother

Bitter sweet after taste of what could have been thoughts

The last chance for the taunting dreams to stop

Lay in telling the truth of that phase of life

“Murder” she wrote of her unborn problem.