From the ashes I can only rise

img1424704979678I would like to thank everyone who made me feel ugly

You made me feel invisible and that it was never okay to be who I am

I have lived my life like no one’s watching

And that has allowed me to dance,sing, shout and laugh like there’s nobody watching

Special shout out to people who have victimized me for being a tomboy

You made me second guess who I was until I was sure

In my every bone that the voice I listened to was really my heart

And to the special people who went to the trouble of making fun of my small features

Thank you for showing me just how cruel the world is

Almost nothing gets me off guard now that I know what people can say to a young girl

Words are powerless to express my gratitude

To the people who bluntly told me I would not make it past high school

It made me study twice as hard every time I failed

Because I had to prove you wrong

And for that, I appreciate making it to University even more

Thanks a ton to everyone I cared for who gradually forgot about my existence

No pain measures against a love one who no longer holds a torch quite like the fire

that still burns for them inside you

It got me paranoid about what was wrong with me

It eventually became a cycle till I realised such is life

It has made me love harder because like you, it could disappear anytime

All my love and thanks to the people who have said no to my words

It is only through rejection that my words have found depth

To the ironies of life, it was so awesome of you

To turn up every time I thought my life could not get worse

I have suffered many sleepless nights only for the truth to dawn on me

That I will never have it all figured out

So why not shut it all out and throw my hands to the sky

Words honestly can’t describe how thankful I am

To everyone who belittled me

You drove me to the edge, where I felt even smaller

It gave me first hand experience of what it feeels like to have nothing to live for

It gave me the courage to start a blog where I could voice out to as many people at the edge as possible

So they can look around and find they are never alone

And to the few I have ever let in and still broke my heart regardless

Please accept my vehement protestations of gratitude

After a great deal of self loathing and despair that again kept me up at night

That often causes me to withdraw, I have found myself closer to God

How can I show how grateful I am?

To the random strangers that have smiled at me, or the people in my life who have made me apart of their lives

You have made my existence a whole less awkward

And you have renewed my faith in the humankind

Without you there is no faith, hope and charity

To fuel the free-spirit I am today .

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Author: Rebel Rouser Bubblehead

Hello!!!! I am a young free spirited African writer trying to embody pan Africanism in my daily life . I use this blog to share my thoughts, views, experiences and most importantly my poetry. Happy reading and if I inspire you, pass the word around and inspire the next person.

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