Candidate 45

I will not speak of another’s heartaches

Be it candidate 44 0r 46

In honest truth I have worries

That I exceed my holding capacity

So relate no longer to the outside world

Because everything I have worked for boils down to this

All the years will be defined

By a period from October to November

Life has proved yet again to be antagonistic

I have put in years and yet hours will make or break me

But that is the least of my worries

My spirit is thronged by the anxiety

Of whether or not I will get there

I know I am losing myself

My anxiety paralyses me into a trance

That has my body locked in suspension

Of lack of food, sleep, focus

I am not the first nor the last

When will I get the perfect mark?

That should bring back my confidence

Which got stolen on registration day

What pains me the most really

Is witnessing candidate 40 to wherever

Understand what keeps me up all night

What kills me then

Is knowing my stronghold has lost faith in my abilities

That turns my world grey

The going is now stormy

And my only wish sometimes

Is to be woken up when November ends

I have come too far to give up

I have lost too much to let it go

I will now end my complaints and get working

For I know with the arrival of October

I will be alone on that desk

Equipped with a few essentials

My pen; My God; My effort.Image


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s