Landed, embarking on a two part journey
First to face my past
Secondly to fight for my future
Jozi stopover, I was in the same city with you
Hours on end, I was breathing recycled ,watered down version of some air you’ve taken in
I hadn’t been this close to you in almost a year
That alone excited me, were we going to talk until both our phones ran low on battery
As was the norm
But that was my undoing, the stitches that could be sewn back on
Why did you not call, you were tired weren’t you?
Cigarette box with no health warning message
So let us dissect the four hours that could have been
You could have taken a taxi, yes, good old taxi and come through for me
Why did you not come, you were tired weren’t you?
You could have explained what was going on, deep down with doors labelled “no entry”
Why did you not open up, you were tired weren’t you?
Questions with no answers, the condition of walking away from a love you cannot bear to walk away from
Sorry I had to dig it up, bring it up, dirty process as it may be
I selfishly want to heal and move on, look at the world through my eyes
Not ours, it was us for a while,a long while, a beautiful while
Its raining life and all it knows to throw at me
So i know the dirt is but a temporary state
Necessary mission to heal
Natural remedies as subscribed by the core of our existence
The need to be happy
I cannot be happy with graveyards in my backyard
And yours is but the hugest heap
The elephant in the backyard of my memories
I forgive you for the mere sake of my sleeping better.